Lately

Pregnancy did a number on me. Mentally, I mean. The nesting in particular. It's cruel, really. You get into hyperdrive with the house cleaning, organizing, folding, sorting, decorating and so forth and all of a sudden BOOM you can't do it anymore. That little creature inside of you motivating you to DO IT ALL is now literally sucking the life out of you (but that's okay, just eat more cookies and it'll regenerate). So you just sit there while he eats, you shovelling back baked goods like they're going out of style (as if), and look around at your once tidy home and remember what it was once like. Sometimes you cry and wonder how you became this person? Not the mom, the freak that enjoys a clean home. Saturdays were for tidying and dangit I liked it that way!

There's nothing like a baby to make you appreciate what things were like before. Not just your house, but your body. Nothing makes you feel like you used to be a swimsuit model quite like having a baby and looking at the aftermath.

That said, there's a new normal around here. And it's being eternally grateful for getting four hours of sleep in a row. A month ago, I was losing my mind excited over an hour of sleep. Look at me now! What whaaaat. I'm so entitled.

Parker has taken a 2-3 hour nap every morning this week. I'm basking in it because I'm sure it'll never last. For instance, I can see him fighting it on the monitor right now which is really unacceptable because, hello, I deserve at least another 90 minutes. What a punk.

As far as the continued nesting goes, I've made myself an extensive list of things I want to get done to keep the increasing mess and chaos at bay, not to mention my sanity in check. As soon as I wrote it I went and reorganized our bedroom which was definitely not on the list. I added it after, though, just so I could check it off. Because that's how you build up your self esteem.

Oh hey, you'll never guess who woke up and mocked me for daring to dream big. Two hours later... I'm back. With coffee. And a half awake baby kicking it in the swing. If I pretend he's asleep, maybe it'll really happen.

So much judgement from such a little person.

I read an article yesterday about how the camera baby monitors can be hacked and someone woke up to a stranger yelling "Wake up, baby!" over their's. Not only is that incredibly creepy, it's just sadistic. Who does that to a sleeping baby? Especially when that sleeping baby's parents are actually getting sleep? I hope they find whoever did it and hide dirty diapers in their hubcaps before arresting them.

Parker's eight weeks old and I'm starting to feel like a human again. Granted, I've been more or less a hermit for the past couple weeks, but it's the to-do list chaining me up, I swear. That and I realized that if he isn't napping well he will if I hold him. And, long story short, somehow we ended up watching three movies on Tuesday. Because I'm a loving mother.

I feel like I'm functional now. I don't have a meltdown at the end of the day if I haven't napped because I'm getting a total of at least six hours of sleep a night now. Two weeks ago four hours was a treat and a half. No wonder I'm feeling so alive!

Last week I was a boss and we walked every day. This week I'm a slob, even though the weather isn't scorching anymore, and only took myself to the gym. The only impressive thing about my first trip back to the gym in four months is that I didn't cry when I put on my workout clothes. There's a garage sale in the neighbourhood today, though, so I'm hoping to take the boss out as long as it doesn't get too hot. Or he doesn't have an amazing nap that simply cannot risk interruption. Okay, I'm a hermit. I change out of my pyjamas every morning, though. That has to count for something.

I got a really horrible entertainment unit off Varage Sale months before Parker was born. I had every intention of refinishing it before he showed up but then I couldn't bend over anymore and figured it could wait. I sanded it last weekend and have been painting it every morning this week, except today because I'm a rebel. I don't know why, but I always think that doing this kind of project will be so easy and quick. Sanding particle board was ridiculously easy but it's taking forever to paint. And someone (me) didn't put the lid on the paint very securely last time it got used so it's a little tacky. And someone (me) didn't think that all the dust in the garage from sanding probably should have been swept up before starting to paint in there. And someone (me) is going to have to learn to be very happy with her less than smooth paint job on her $5 entertainment centre. Aaaand someone (me) is just praying that the horribleness is erased by new backing, white paint, and new hardware. Otherwise that someone (me) will be found crying in the garage later this weekend. So you can pray for me, too. It's just such a tragedy to waste a good nap.

And now I'm going to take my own advice and attempt to roast chickpeas while I still have free will.