August 10, 2012

Breaking News.

I have discovered the answer to one of life's great mysteries. Really, I have. Last night it suddenly dawned on me why Barbie walks so weird. You know, with the unbending legs and pointed toes. Not only is making her stand next to impossible but walking? Forget about it. I realized why she walks so strangely and it has nothing to do with the location of her internal organs. You ready for it?

Barbie walks weird because she has shin splints.

Seriously! It's the only logical explanation. I found myself trying to stretch out my aching shins yesterday and realized that the Barbie walk really had it going on. Every time I bent my feet towards normal position I could feel the burn again. Barbie legs made it all better. It made me realize that perhaps the cure to power walking in flip flops, an issue I never had until Disneyland in March, is wearing high heels. I kid you not. How else are you supposed to maintain the Barbie walk for long periods of time? Stilettos, people! Good thing I recently invested in a grown up pair shoes. What better motivation to learn to walk/stand in them than curing my shin splints?

Barbie may have seriously messed with head until the age of twelve, but she's still teaching me valuable life lessons. That and that you don't need a toilet in your dream house if you have a folding bathtub/sink combo. 

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